{ MIAMI }

When Z and I were in the pre-moving phase of our transition to New York, we discussed many of the things we wanted to do and goals we wanted to achieve while we lived on the East Coast. We talked about the bucket list items to accomplish in the city as well as the cities outside of New York we had to visit. Miami was one of the first we ever discussed and it has been on our minds since we moved. After our first year in New York came and went, I knew I wanted to plan a surprise birthday trip to Miami for Zach’s 32nd birthday. While we both enjoy the fact that we are both planners, sometimes it prevents us from truly living in the moment. We oftentimes find ourselves in conversation about the future, post New York life, when do we want kids, what’s the next step for our careers, etc. Because I knew Miami was on the top of our lists for places to visit and, let’s be honest, it’s a city for silly, adult fun, it would be a perfect place to celebrate exactly where we are in life; fairly newlyweds, childless, and a will to see new places. I was determined to not only make the trip happen but to keep it a secret from Z for MONTHS. I have never kept a secret that long in my life and I still can’t believe I did it. I booked the trip in February and I didn’t tell him until we were at the airport on May 4!

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I spent the majority of my twenties working in the hospitality industry which means while I am an excellent resource for all things travel, I can be a bit of a hotel snob and will spend HOURS researching to find the perfect place at the right price. This was true of my Miami hotel research but I couldn’t be happier with my find. The Confidante Hotel, formerly a Thompson Hotel and now a Hyatt Unbound Collection hotel, was perfect for the intention of the trip. Steps from the beach, two pools, four bars on property, and easy access to South Beach and Downtown Miami. One of our favorite spots on the property was Nina’s House. Best known for their drinks with made to order fresh pressed juice cocktails and 2 for 1 happy hour. A perfect welcome to Miami!

During the time when Z had no idea we were going to Miami I was asking friends and acquaintances in the city (i.e. my hair dresser!) for recommendations on great restaurants and bars in Miami and Miami Beach. We hit up South Beach the first night in town, which honestly was like a mini-Las Vegas. Fun for a few drinks at an open-air, outdoor bar, but also a gamut of characters walking around that were fun to “observe”, to put it mildly. It was very different from what we envisioned which was classic beachfront restaurants, people dressed in their Miami-chic attire, and overall just a bit less seedy than what it was. This is not to say it wasn’t a great time it was just very different than our expectations! It was entertaining and more casual which ended up being nice to lay low and not feel like we needed to be super dressed up every time we went out. We’re always up for a little exploring, being in new places, and embracing the environment around us. Hence, why we love to travel. A few notable places in South Beach that we loved, some recommended by friends, some by Yelp: The Clevelander, the Naked Taco (for Cinco de Mayo!), and Havana 1957 for some authentic Cuban food.

Friday morning we were pumped to get our toes in the sand and swim in the ocean but the weather in Miami Beach had other plans. We got a solid hour in before a torrential downpour made its appearance and lasted for four hours. After we ran off departed the beach we enjoyed some Cinco de Mayo festivities in South Beach and then made it back to the hotel for some afternoon sunshine before the sunset.

Saturday was the PERFECT day. The day began with another surprise I coordinated for the weekend. One of my coworkers and her husband, Angie and Mike, became fast friends of ours when we first moved to New York. However, they snowbird to Florida every winter so we were only able to spend a couple months with them before the moved to Tampa for the fall/winter season. Angie and I have kept in touch while they have been away and when I mentioned we would be in Miami and that they should join us, they were all in. It was AWESOME. For people we have known less than a year to drive across the state of Florida to spend 24 hours with us was remarkable. Originally they were supposed to come for the whole weekend but last minute work commitments changed their plans. But the one day they were with us was wonderful! I mentioned to Z about an hour before they were set to arrive that “some other people are going to be joining us” and he was wracking his brain to figure out who was coming. He was equal parts surprised and touched that our new East Coast friends had made such an effort. Heart happy moment! We spent the day on the beach and swam in the ocean for HOURS!

Our last night in town we went into Downtown Miami to this restaurant I found called The River Yacht Club. I read about these restaurants that were right on the Miami River (which I had NO idea Miami even had a river!) where yachts of all different shapes and sizes can coast through and park to get off the boat and enjoy a meal. Some of these yachts are 100 ft. long and this river is NOT big by any means. We even saw one pull away from the restaurant after a group of diners had finished their meal and got back on their yacht. It is a whole new level of wealth we had never seen before! It made for a unique atmosphere for dinner. The River Yacht Club also had a dance floor and live band while you dined. Warm winds, fresh, organic ingredients, and the sunsetting while we ate made for a stellar last night in town.

After dinner we headed across the river to another spot I had heard lots of good things about called Seaspice. It was a bit overpriced for us for a meal but it was a perfect nightcap. They, too, had giant yachts parked alongside the restaurant, but instead of a dance floor and live music they had a long, large couch that encircled the bar area as well as a swing by the hostess stand which was one of my favorite parts of the restaurant. How could you leave without sitting on the swing?!

Angie & Mike. I said it in Miami but I will say it again here. It meant so much to have you join us for all the festivities! Your open hearts, appetite for adventure and trying new things, and generosity of your time and friendship are just a few of the reasons why we feel so grateful to have met you in New York and even more touched that we now have this trip to cement our friendship. We can’t wait for you to be back in the city for summer and for more good times ahead!

Z. Here’s to a new year in this great, big city. Being with you and observing the way you’ve embraced our new normal, growing your role at work, evolving your look (just a hair! 😉 ), and living each day with intention has been an exciting time in our married life. I am in awe of you and all you’ve accomplished. I can’t wait to see what this next year will bring for you or rather what you’ll bring to your 32nd year of life!

{ The City of Brotherly Love }

One of our goals for 2017 was to finally begin exploring the cities on the eastern seaboard. 2016 was a year of acclimation to the city and really exploring Manhattan so this year we wanted to explore outside the city limits. As West Coast kids we are limited in how much we’ve seen on the East Coast, so we comprised a list of every available weekend of the year and the cities we must see. We corresponded available weekends with the cities we wanted to see. My work schedule can be a bit tricky as I work one weekend day every week but with planning ahead we can sometimes get things switched to make getting out of town a little easier. Two days after we made the calendar I realized I had a last minute opportunity to switch some shifts around which would allow us a little less than 48 hours to get out of town. Philadelphia had been at the top of our list for awhile, plus it is so close to NYC. It also looked like an easy trip whose fun-factor would not be weather-dependent. So two MegaBus tickets and a hotel reservation later, we made our way to Philly!

We had a short list of tourist-y things we wanted to see so we tried to plan the limited time accordingly. Zach really likes to have a specific plan when we travel (no surprise to those who know us well!) and I really enjoy the walking around, “living like a local” type of travel, with a little taste of the tourist-y stuff. Priorities: The Rocky Balboa Steps, the Liberty Bell, Reading Terminal (like the Pike Place Market or Chelsea Market of Philly), and the LOVE sculpture.

We kept saying throughout that first day how much the city reminded us of Seattle. The people are friendly, the buildings are a mix of either rich history or modern flair, and it was a very walkable city (we only used an Uber twice the whole weekend!). There was snow on the ground but the temps were in the 50’s so it didn’t feel so bad. Note: I can’t believe my SoCal blood is saying that 50 degrees was not so bad. Face palm.

The Rocky Balboa Steps lead up to the Philadelphia Art Museum which we sort of peaked our heads into before we stumbled upon a statue of Rocky. There was a line of people waiting to have their photo taken with the statue and a random citizen was offering to take photos of the groups of people. When in Philly! We also just had to run up the steps to live out the Rocky experience. I mean, c’mon. We couldn’t leave without doing that!

The city has such great signage throughout that you really don’t need Google Maps to figure out what there is to do near you or around you. We walked back towards downtown and saw signs for the Franklin Institute of Science.  Lots of interesting exhibits and interactive areas, but I most enjoyed the statue of Benjamin Franklin.

Day two we set out with a few more missions of tourist excursions before we eventually settled ourselves at a sports bar to catch some of the March Madness tournament. First, we went to see the Liberty Bell which, truthfully, I expected to be so much bigger. I don’t even know WHY I thought it was going to be big but it was certainly not as grand as I expected it to be. There was a really informative and expansive exhibit about the history of the bell, how it wasn’t actually a “liberty” bell given the injustices of slavery and women’s rights at the time it was created, and how it wasn’t really rung the day the Declaration of Independence was signed.

After the bell we took a walk across the street to see Independence Hall where the Constitution and Declaration of Independence were debated and signed. It was pretty remarkable to see how these buildings have survived over hundreds of years. We decided to forego the tour and just walk around to explore the site.

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We made our way to Reading Terminal which was very cool but a TOTAL ZOO. We took a ten-minute walk through it and looked at each other and immediately realized that was all we needed.

After a long lunch and some college basketball we made our way to the final item on our list, the AMOR sculpture. Upon researching on the way to Philly, we discovered that the LOVE sculpture was removed and being renovated to make its reappearance in summer. In its place is the AMOR sculpture. We arrived with only one other couple there and the rain was starting to fall. We agreed to get a quick selfie and make our way back to the hotel. However we quickly realized that the guy had just proposed to the gal and moments later a huge group of people, their friends and family, crossed the street to surprise the gal with a celebration. So while it was so cute to witness it was kind of crushing our quick photo plans. We eventually made it work and got out of the rain!

On our last night in town we spent the first half of the evening at Moshulu, a large ship in the harbor near the city, with a full restaurant and bar. Great recommendation from Dorothy and Cole! We ended the evening at this darling jazz bar recommended by my coworker, Sarah, called Time, with live jazz music and different clocks throughout the entire bar. Besides the amazing ambiance the bar had a list of Washington state wines that made me feel right at home!

Overall, we really loved Philly. Every restaurant, bar, or social interaction we had with people was friendly and welcoming. The first restaurant we went to gave us a round of beers on them as a welcome to the city. Our hotel cafe gave us free breakfast sandwiches, just because. It was starting to get a little weird! We are so used to the rough, angst-filled New Yorkers that we were startled by the friendliness at times. A reminder of why getting out of the city is so important! It was a cool town with an authentic culture that really explains their motto of brotherly love.

Check that one off the list, Mr. Harris!

{ 2017: Bury & Carry List }

Happy 2017! I can’t believe we are already halfway through the first month of the new year. I was recently inspired after reading this article by Maria Shriver about what she wants to “carry” and “bury” in 2017. I have found the idea of resolutions to be daunting especially because it diminishes what you learned and maybe even mastered the previous year. It begs “what more can you do?” instead of also validating your successes. Furthermore it challenged me to really consider what I am proud of from 2016, what I want to continue through 2017, and what I can truly leave behind.

What I Want to Bury:

  • Self-Doubt. There is nothing that handicapped me more in 2016 than self-doubt. When I began the year I was a successful Business Development Director at the height of my career, newly married, and about to move to New York. I arrived with confidence that I would find a sparkly new job and conquer wifehood with ease. Unfortunately it didn’t work out at all how I planned. Months flew by, what felt like hundreds of job applications had been submitted, and I was alone a lot during the day until Z got home from work. The loneliness was a perfect incubus to cultivate a cloud of fear and doubt that I was not good enough. Who was I without a successful career? Why would a man as wonderful as my husband, meanwhile blossoming and thriving in his career, want a pathetic woman such as myself who couldn’t find her way in New York? Self-doubt consumed my every day. Eventually I realized it was me who was holding me back. I had complete control of realizing my happiness and as soon as I worked on what it was that made me truly happy, outside of a career woman and being Z’s wife, I was set free from my doubt. I was a lot more than just those two things. It was finding ways to energize and inspire me. I am not perfect and battling self-doubt will always be a dynamic of life but for the purpose of this list, I am committed to continuing to pursue my happy and diminish the doubt.
  • Us vs. Them. While I don’t really want to get into the political arena on this blog, I have to acknowledge my approach to interacting with friends, family, and strangers whose political opinions are different than my own. This past year was a tumultuous and distressing time for everyone regardless of the candidate you supported. As the President-Elect is being sworn into office as I type this I am a gamut of emotions. For the purpose of this bury list, I want to work on diminishing this idea of Us vs. Them. This mentality is what got us here, divided. It’s not the first time in our nation’s history but for those living it for the first time it is painful, a state of disbelief. I look back on 2016 and interactions with some of my friends and family who I considered to be them. They supported the candidate I did not. As frustrated as that made me, I am certain my support of the other candidate made them equally so. My regret is that I didn’t engage in an adult, open-minded conversation with them. Instead I steered clear, avoided it, and judged them. Us vs. Them. I could have listened, shared passions, seek understanding in a constructive way. We are never going to be a united nation until both sides really examine the other side. It will continue to be two teams. Of course I am not naive to believe I could have actually changed those friends or families’ minds but maybe we would have understood each other better and learned something. I also know there will always be two teams but I don’t believe it has to be as harshly divided and vicious as it stands right now. As I avoid my television today I am not doing so to perpetuate the #NotMyPresident or anything like it. I’m not happy about it, not by any means. But instead of opening my social media and perpetuating the drama, today I choose to establish how I will carry into the new year, this new regime, and how I can control my piece of the world and influence positivity. How can I help to bridge this large gap that I helped build along with the other millions of us? I will continue to be authentic and steadfast in my beliefs but will not use it to shut out the other side.
  • Living in Future Tense. Planning is a way of life in the Harris household. Neither one of us are fly-by-the-seat-of-our-pants people and we are always looking ahead. That’s not to say making plans and being intentional about life are a bad thing but in our current circumstance it has hindered us. Our life in New York has always been temporary with the plan to move back to our West Coast home. At some point, however, it felt as if we were biding our time. And when I say we I mean mostly me. Anxiously planning and awaiting the opportunity to start planning our move home. Z has been a great reminder for me as I have had a harder time settling into our life. He reminds me and recommits that we want to make a life here. If we’re just watching the months tick by and counting the days until we get to go back to the West Coast we won’t really be giving our opportunity here a chance. We took a lot of trips back west last year, Seattle in particular, and we got used to seeing those friends and family every couple of months. It meant a whole year went by without an official honeymoon like we had originally planned. We sacrificed vacation days we could have used to travel the East Coast as we intended. While those trips were mostly for weddings and well worth the time and money spent we cannot do the same this year. We need to invest in our life in New York just as we set out to do. I want to miss this place when we leave it, not relish in the joy that we finally get to leave. I want to bury this living in the future and pump the breaks to live presently. Grounded in our New York life and cherishing this once in a lifetime experience. It will be gone before we know it.

What I Want to Carry:

  • Gratitude. We post about it on social media, we talk about its importance, but how often are we actually putting this into practice? I have learned and posed questions about ‘marriage’ this year and what does and doesn’t work for our marriage. One of the biggest things that we practiced this year which has become an integral part of our day to day is the act of being grateful. A simple ‘thank you’ goes such a long way. When Z has worked a long day and he comes home to a clean house, he acknowledges the work and says thank you. On date nights when we’ve just enjoyed an evening out, I share with Z how much I appreciate all his hard work to provide the ability to live in this amazing city and indulge in these experiences. Even something as simple as watching Sunday football together, he will thank me for creating our home and taking care of the things that make our life full. I may be overloading you with anecdotes but the point is I think we grossly underestimate how much our partners need to be appreciated and thanked. Out loud. Not carry it with us as an assumption that they “just know.” How good does it feel to hear that acknowledgment and gratefulness? Whether it’s a simple act or a grand gesture we all need and deserve affirmations for who we are and how we show up for each other.
  • Spin & Yoga. One of the best roses that came from the garden of thorns of being unemployed was discovering an active lifestyle. I tried countless fitness studios and different workouts until I found the classes and teachers that felt like home. Nothing clears my mind and makes me feel as good as leaving a class sweaty and strong. SoulCycle & mang’Oh yoga have changed me in mind, body, and spirit and I can’t imagine my day to day life without them.
  • The Lust to Wander. One of the most exciting parts of living on the East Coast is traveling to new places. It is remarkable how close these states are to one another and in a three-hour train ride you can cross over five states. Just thirty minutes north of Manhattan are forests and rivers that provide great relief from the concrete jungle. We dipped our toes into a few new places in 2016 and we’ve committed to seeing a handful of more cities and areas of New York this year. I can’t wait to see more of this beautiful coast.
  • Team Harris. I don’t particularly agree with people who say things don’t change all that much from being engaged to married. Maybe it’s because Z and I made such a drastic change to our life with a cross-country move. I still believe that the stakes are higher once you call someone your husband, not just your boyfriend. My life is no longer about just my wants and needs. I have to consider Z’s needs sometimes even before my own. What I’ve come to learn over the past year, a big lesson taught by my husband, is that when one of us is making decision they are ultimately our decisions. Z is better at change than I am. That’s just a fact in our marriage. He is level-headed and makes choices with carefully thought out logic (excel spreadsheets!) and I wear my heart on my sleeve and make choices with my gut based on the way something makes me feel. Whenever he presents a new idea, like moving apartments for example, he knows I am going to be resistant. “The market has changed, we can save money, we will experience a new neighborhood, etc.” It’s not my idea of a good time. I love our home in Murray Hill. I immediately classify it as his idea. He is doing this to me. Pushing me into this idea. But after I let the dust settle on my reaction, I always realize the same thing. It is the best decision for us. Z has seamlessly been able to change his thinking about what he wants into what’s best for us. True, it is his idea but my husband to date has never proposed something that has only been for his benefit or because he wants to do it. I am always a large factor in his consideration. We are always at the forefront of his decision making. It’s not easy to admit when you’re partner is right, especially when you want to be right. But I am happy to carry this ideology that Z seems to have adapted to so well and patiently waits for me to realize. It’s not about what I want or what he wants. It’s about what we want and what’s best for our life together. It doesn’t mean we will always agree or see the other person’s side but it’s about remembering that neither of us are ever selfishly making decisions. I want to carry this faith of partnership with me into this year and all the years ahead of us. Thanks for the lesson, babe. Even as much as I detest some of your new ideas, I am proud to be on Team Harris.

What do you want to carry and bury into this year?

Write it on your heart that every day is the best day in the year. Your success and happiness lies in you. Resolve to keep happy, and your joy and you shall form an invincible host against difficulties. – Ralph Waldo Emerson

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Top of the Rock – 1.12.17

{ Cole & McKyna’s 21 Run }

November 11th was a monumental day in the Harris/Jacobson family history. The youngest members of the family finally arrived at their 21st birthday! Cole and McKyna had requested that the occasion be celebrated with only their immediate family as opposed to going with a group of friends. So we all bucked up to put our party pants on to make their 21-run with their parents and much older brother and sister and their spouses the best weekend ever!

The older siblings and their spouses have spent a fair amount of time in Las Vegas, especially in our twenties. It was surreal to be back in Vegas as we were all flooded with memories of birthdays, bachelor/ette parties, and “just because” party weekends. We had each shared our suggestions of places to go and things to do to make their weekend exactly what they wanted it to be. Also, my in-laws/Z’s parents haven’t been to Vegas for THIS type of trip and were happy to rely on us for guidance to cultivate the party weekend Cole and McKyna desired. As a family, I think we can all agree that we really packed it ALL in and it was a weekend we won’t soon forget!

We each arrived on a Thursday evening and we met up at the Bar at Times Square at the New York New York hotel (I know, I know. The irony of flying from New York to Las Vegas only to end up in New York!). Zach’s stepsister Sally, her husband Nathan and Z and I got in earlier than the rest of the family so we spent a solid hour dancing to the dueling pianos and drinking cocktails to warm us up for the night ahead. My in-laws Dorothy and Chris and Cole and McKyna arrived just at the stroke of midnight when their 21st birthday was official!

The next day we hit the pool to relax and surprise Cole & Kyna with custom shirts made by Sally to commemorate the party and its crew! The day in the sun felt so nice after leaving the cold autumn of New York. Z spent some time teaching Kyna how to play Black Jack which turned into a slight obsession for her throughout the weekend.

Since this day and evening was the official birthday we went big for celebrations. Sally and Nathan had driven in from Temecula, CA and brought with them the most incredible cake I have ever seen. We were all so impressed it made it from the five-hour drive to the hotel room in one piece! Vegas-themed and included their college logos (rival schools!) on either side of the cake. It was ridiculously cool!

The plan was to surprise Cole & Kyna in their room with the cake and presents before we headed to dinner. Dorothy had decorated their room and Z and I had prepped our present for the family to sign before the official surprise. A little backstory on our gift…three years ago I went on my first family vacation with Z’s family to Cabo San Lucas. Cole and Kyna were 17 at the time and one night we went on a pirate ship booze cruise. Cole and Kyna had gotten permission to drink, particularly since Dorothy and Chris were there, and we’d all be there to monitor. Welp, only 2-3 drinks in and they could not handle it. They were so certain they would be able to hang and within an hour of the cruise they were passed out on the side of the boat. At the time is was part comical and part bummer but when we all came to laugh about it at the end of the trip I promised that the picture I took of them would come back to haunt them for their 21st birthday.

The time had come!

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Each of us signed their personalized frames with birthday wishes and our favorite hangover cure (a takeaway from my 21st birthday that I loved!) and the gifts were a hit. It was so fun to bring it all back full circle!

Top of the World & Ghostbar. After pre-dinner cake and gifts we headed to the Stratosphere’s restaurant, Top of the World, which had 360-degree views of Las Vegas and the strip. The food was delicious and the views weren’t bad either. It was a perfect celebration spot!

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I was pretty insistent that at some point over the trip we visit Ghostbar at the Palms hotel. It was one of my favorite lounges on my previous visits and I thought it would be a perfect segue-way from our views at dinner to drinks with a view. The bar itself wasn’t actually that crowded but it made for a good warm-up for Dorothy and Chris as well as Cole and Kyna. The music was loud, people were dancing, and the older siblings were able to buck up and hang until 3:30am when the new 21-year olds were ready to go home!

Strolls on the Strip. After the late night/early morning we were struggling a little tired so we planned a low key day to get out of the casino and get a little fresh air. Since Cole & Kyna had never been on the strip we hit all the classic stops, including the Fountains at Bellagio show and walking through the Forum Shops at Caesars Palace. Later, we headed back to our hotel to watch college football at the sports bar before we got ready for our last night out. And by watch college football I mean the boys watched football while Kyna sporadically gambled, Dorothy and Chris alternated naps before the games, and I attempted to watch football before I succumb to a much needed nap.

XS. A couple weeks before the trip, Cole had mentioned his favorite DJ, Diplo, would be playing at XS at the Encore the weekend we would be there. Dorothy immediately jumped to action to figure out how we could guarantee entry for all of us at this very popular club and also allow her and Chris to be able to sit down throughout the night as opposed to standing all night on the dance floor. After some research between her and Z, they landed on a surprise bottle service table for the night. The plan was to make Cole and Kyna stand in the general admission line (which was SO long!) to make them worry we wouldn’t get in and eventually Z led us to the other side of the club with the much shorter bottle service line. Once we got into the club Kyna and Cole thought their brother was some kind of Vegas bad-ass hustler but once we arrived at our outdoor table the surprise finally revealed itself. Cole and Kyna were so surprised and thrilled at the plan and it really made the entire evening!

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So you know how I mentioned that Dorothy was concerned her and Chris would need a place to sit for the night, which prompted the bottle service conversation in the first? Ha! They were on their feet for most of the night until 2:30am when we called it quits. They were dancing and even had people coming up to our group to dance with them! Love you two so much!!!

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We danced the night away and seeing Diplo was a total blast! Kyna eventually reached her limit at 2:30am when she requested to go home so she could sleep and wake up early to play Black Jack before her flight. Ha! Z created a gambling Black Jack monster! To be fair, she did bring home some winnings. The boys ended up staying at XS later than the rest of us and didn’t get back to the hotel until 4:30am which included a food run to Fatburger on the way back. Everyone woke up ready to kiss the weekend goodbye, feeling accomplished, exhausted, and a little dehydrated!

Cole & McKyna. Welcome to 21. You’ve now officially crossed over into what will be the most fun time in your twenties. Embrace the responsibility, enjoy the silly good times, and continue to be the best friends you are to each other no matter how far apart you may be. Your bond is enviable and perfectly unique and I’m proud to be your sister from another mister!

Dorothy & Chris. I don’t know many parents that would be willing and able to participate in such a trip. You really are the most stellar and selfless duo when it comes to your children and there are no lengths you wouldn’t go to make them happy and feel loved. You’ve created quite a motley crew and I’m honored to be a part of it.

Sally & Nathan. I missed your kiddos this trip but truth be told I absolutely loved getting time with just the two of you. Between you guys and Z and I, we make such a playful and easy dynamic that I am so grateful for. Thank you for the belly laughs and memories we made together on this trip. I’m already planning the next trip in my head!

Harris. You are the best big brother ever. Your soft spot for your siblings only makes me love you more every time we’re with your family. You are always willing and able to give what you can to make every situation memorable. Also, thanks for cutting yourself off at XS so you wouldn’t be hungover for our anniversary the next day. You’re the best.